Home Tour 2013- How I Decorate On The Cheap Without Lookin' Like A Floozy

****Warning. This is an extremely long and newsy post. You might wanna get a box of Little Debbie's and a glass of milk. I will wait. ****

By the way, I started this post on February 15th.
In case you were wondering how efficient I am.


Go to any DIY blog and I can guarantee they have a "home tour" tab somewhere on their page.
I have been toiling with the notion of putting one on my blog but I am on the fence.
I don't want to look like I am showing off my home in any way.
What I would be showing is how YOU can create a cool house on a small budget.
Kind of like a tutorial.
So I am leaving it up to you.
Let me know via the blog, Facebook or Twitter if you think I should add a permanent Home Tour tab at the top of the blog.

In the meantime, here is my home circa 2013.
First I will show you the pictures then I give you the details on the paint colors, decor, or links on where to find items.
Pretty much everything pretty in my house comes from garage sales, Goodwill or Hobby Lobby on 70% off clearance.
So I can guarantee that you won't be able to find the exact match.
I like to think of my look as one of a kind crappy chic.
At least that is what my reality TV show title will be.

Click on the links in red to see the stores, items or blog posts.
There are some great before pictures.
As well as the usual witty banter.
Ok smart a@# banter.


Our entry way is not really a true entry way.
Its got a door.
And a hook to hang stuff.

The door was originally white but I painted it black last September and I love it so much better.
It makes it look so much warmer in here and gave me the courage to paint other doors.
Nothing too exciting here....the rug is basic and not at all decor-like.
We got this and the one by the back door at Target last year.
They are rubber backed and tough but look like a sisal rug.
Under 13 bucks each.

The galvanized planter on the floor was free and the plant in it was from Michael's years ago on clearance.
The cross is from Hobby Lobby on clearance a couple years ago.
The Is What It Is sign is a gift from my brother and sister in law years ago.
I say that waaaay too much, by the way.
I also want a sign that says Awesomesauce.
Hint hint.



The first room you will see will be the dining room.
When it isn't the living room.
This room is onegiantroom and it is a paininthebutt to decorate.
I have flipped this room so much that friends get confused when they come over.
Didn't this used to be your dining room?
Yes!
When it isn't.
For right now, the first room you see is our dining room.

This table, thiiiiis table.
This piece of furniture is my most favorite.
EVAH.
We got it at a no longer in biz furniture store right before we moved in, almost eight years ago.
I feel like this has been in our family forever.
We will never ever get rid of this piece.
I didn't want something stuffy or formal because that's just not who we are.
This is Broyhill and the collection is called the Attic Heirloom Collection.

The black table on the other wall was a Goodwill find.
It was puke tan but I spray painted it black.
We paid less than five bucks for it.
The lamp on it was on clearance at Hobby Lobby two years ago for 20 bucks.
The curtains I made last winter.
Don't get me started on those.......



So look over to your left and here is the now "living room" portion of this onebigroom.

The chest is actually made for a bedroom but we use it in our dining room.
This was my first big girl furniture purchase made in 1995.
This is from the Broyhill Fontana collection.
Which no longer exists outside of Craigslist or Ebay.

I love this so much and love how functional this has been for us.
This goes to show, you don't have to use furniture meant for certain rooms in those rooms.
You could use a dresser in a large kitchen as an island if you wanted to.
The lamp is from Goodwill last year, like four bucks.
The ANTIQUES sign was a luuucky find.
Found it at our church rummage sale three years ago for 10 bucks.
It was the sign from a real antique store just down the road.

The couch was a floor model clearance item we got last winter.
We do well with leather.
Especially because we don't do well with fabric couches.
Because we don't do well with very messy children.

The coffee table was from my previous life (first marriage) and was a gift to me from my mom and dad, this baby is now almost 20 years old.
Broyhill Fontana again.....try Craigslist or Ebay.

The black cabinet came with the dining room set and I love it because it holds all the girls creations they have made over the years in school, classes etc.
Plus the top shelf holds the liquor.
So its a magical cabinet.

The plant in the corner is a new addition circa September 2012.
We got "her' at Home Depot for 10 bucks!
"Her" name is Zoe...named by my five year old.
She looks like a Zoe doesn't she?

The artwork on top of the black cabinet I made back in 2010.
The subway art on the right side of the couch was a gift from my mama.
The art on the left of the couch is from my oldest daughters kindergarten art class and I framed it in a Target frame.
The artwork on the side of the black cabinet is a poster of artwork done by Tony Bennett.
We love him, saw him in concert and I got the hubs the poster one Christmas.
I slapped it in a poster frame I got 11 years ago.
The SAY GRACE sign above the curtains, I made...inspired by Pinterest!
The basket on the coffee table holding all the five year old's papers, crayons etc is from Hobby Lobby last summer, 50% off.
The paint color in both rooms is Peanut Butter by Behr.




You okay?
Need a break?
Go ahead.
I will wait.
I have to go to the bathroom anyway.....

We painted this kitchen in November and it is the single most favorite room color in my home.
That green is amazing and the blogger who gave me the idea was just featured in HGTV magazine showing her room with this exact color!



The table was my gramma's, the chairs we found on the side of the road three years ago.
They were black and we painted them off white.
The yellow cabinet is my record cabinet from 8th grade and I painted it yellow last spring.
The owl lamp is from Target last year.
The mirror on the left side of the wall is from Hobby Lobby back in the 90s.
The star with flowers was a gift from my mama at a craft show a few years ago.
The curtains are from Lowe's.
The clock was five bucks on clearance at Target last year.
The homework hanger is from Goodwill a few years ago.
The "our life" sign, I made from an old piece of wood.
The number 4 artwork is another craptastic invention of mine.
The eye vac on the floor is the best invention known to neat freaks everywhere.
If you have dogs, messy kids or both?
Get this.
Now.
The paint colors are Revere Pewter by Ben Moore and Offbeat Green by Sherwin Williams.

We redid our kitchen counters almost five years ago.
Best big project we have done besides our floors.
The jars of flour and sugar are from IKEA.
The jar that holds the lemons was a hand me down from my mom and dad when they moved.
The lemons are from Dollar Tree.
The eat sign was a birthday gift from my brother and sister in law a few years ago.



On to the family room.....

The above is where all the magic happens, peeps.
Get your mind outta the gutter.
This is where I do most if not all of my blogging.
Right at this table.
I renovated the table last spring, it was a wedding gift from my mom and dad for my first wedding.
The chairs came with the table and the pads are from World Market on clearance.
The fern is from Goodwill and the galvanized tin its in is free from a neighbor.
The lamp is from Home Depot eight years ago.
The wire basket holding all our junk is from a flea market.
The picture frames above the table are from Hobby Lobby eight years ago.
The FAMILY sign I also got at Hobby Lobby three years ago on sale 50 % off.
The stars I got at a store in central Illinois called Jeffrey Alan's years ago.
The curtain panel is from Target, 19.99.
The paint color is Campfire by Glidden or Behr.
I am sad to say, they don't make this color anymore.....:(


To the other side of the family room....

This is where most of the "living" goes on in this house. 
The couch is a clearance item we bought at a local furniture store almost six years ago.
The end tables were from my hubs bachelor pad, a garage sale find, and I repainted them last summer.
The lamps are going away....hopefully sooner than later.
They are from Home Depot eight years ago but the wiring in one is jakey and they don't give off the best light.
If I can find a great clearance lamp sale, I will be getting rid of these in the next six months.
The toy basket is from Target...we had a gift card and got it this year....love this so much!
The mirror above the fireplace was bought at Marshall's seven years ago.
The book page wreath on the mirror was made by my mama last year.
The little lamp is from Target years ago...clearance for 3 bucks.
The stars are from Goodwill years ago.
The PRAY sign is from Hob Lob a few years ago.
The chalkboard artwork is something I created a few years ago using a Goodwill frame.

 

 

See our "entertainment center"?
It was our "baby changing table" when Ellie was a baby.
Then it became her "dresser".
But it was way to large and when it came time for us to buy a larger TV two years ago, we moved it downstairs to become our "entertainment center"!
Work with what ya got, peeps!!
Oh and did I mention this was free to us?
A neighbor who was moving gave it away!

The shutter I got at a flea market a few years ago and just have it propped up.
Because I don't know what else to do with it.
I like it there and it really serves no purpose except to hold Christmas cards during the holidays.
(Tip- I use clothespins to hold the cards to the shutters!)

The cross I got at Hobby Lobby years ago on clearance, the star I have had for years.
It has been at least 10 different colors.
Spray paint is goooood.
The piece of  paper taped to the wall is Ellie's rendering of our family.
Its been up there for six months.
I just can't take it down.



I see you nodding off.....its ok.
Go take a nap.
I will be here when you wake up!

This is our entry from the garage and it has kinda become our artwork hallway.
The artwork on the right is all done on artist canvas over the years.
That is a great and cheap way to show off your children's art.
You can get a package of two of these canvases at the craft stores for under five bucks with coupons or on sale.
Get out the tempera paint and let them go to town.
Anna has done this since she was five years old and Ella since she could hold a paintbrush.
The back door is metal, so we hang Ella's preschool projects on there with magnets.
I got this idea from my sister in law, it saves me so much room in my kitchen since they come home with SOOO much stuff from school.
That metal artwork on the left side I got at Hobby Lobby years ago on clearance for ten bucks!

See those baskets on the wall?
Shoe organizers.
It keeps the shoes off the floor because that is a narrow hall AND a laundry room in one!
Yay me!
So I keep the five year old's shoes in this hall way because her feet are still small enough to fit the shoes on these baskets.
As she grows, I have no idea what I am gonna do.
My 13 year old keeps her shoes/backpack etc. in a cabinet by the front door.
The hubs keeps his in the garage by the door entrance.
And mine are in a plastic bin in the front closet.
Why we have all our shoes separate is beyond me, its more of a space thing.
We don't have a "mudroom" so its survival of the fittest as it pertains to shoe storage in our home.

The master bedroom.
So this room is above our garage....cold in the winter and like livin' on the equator in the summer.
No happy medium.
The furniture is from this falloffthebackofatruck furniture store yeeeeears ago.
And it is baaad.
Like really bad.
But it was cheap.
So we will live with it for now.
I secretly love those iron beds from IKEA.
The curtains are from Lowe's and those blinds are going away this summer.
I want to get bamboo shades for in here since there is so much sun...not bad but add to that when you live on the equator in June and we need a better solution.
We have had the same bedding in here since the day we moved in.
AND we got it at Walmart.
Everyone was shocked BC it looks like something from Pottery Barn but no, Walmart.
And still going some almost eight years later.
I have a serious problem spending money on bedding.
Sheets and pillow cases, no problem but quilts and comforters?
Eesh.
Its sooo pricey and you only sleep in there so I just don't see the point.

The lamps are from Target when I was preggo with my youngest....nesting.....the shades are burlap and got them last year for under five bucks each on clearance at Target as well.
The metal scroll artwork is from ....where else??....Hobby Lobby 50 % off.
The color on the walls?
I cannot for the life of me remember.
They are a neutral tan color.
And a Benjamin Moore color.
The artwork on the window wall?
Dollar General.
Five bucks each, purchased eight years ago.

My teenager's room.
NEVER looks this nice.
This is right after we painted it.
In November.
Basically this room has changed 15 times since this picture was taken.
Because she is just like her mother.
That cord, BTW, gives me the heebie jeebies.
She still has a cord like that because this room has hardly any outlets.
And probably because she likes to freak me out.
That's what teens do.
Click here for all the details since this is a recent re-do.

 

 

My five year old's room never looks this nice either.
She was at school when this picture was taken.
I can guarantee it was destroyed within minutes after her arrival.
The nightstand was mine from 15 years ago.
The bed was her sister's as was the bedding.....we like to hand me down in this family if you haven't already noticed.
See the dresser?
It looks suspiciously like the one in her sis' room, doesn't it?
That's because it is the one from her sis' room.
This photo was taken in February.
We switched their dressers because a 13 year old needs a lot more drawer space than a five year old.
Workin'. With. What. Ya. Got.

The basement was already finished when we moved in.
But it was just white walls with one focal wall painted baby poop brown.
We lived with it for almost seven years before we finally painted it and made it bright and less poopy.
Those white shelves we got at our church rummage sale for five bucks each.
I love how they look like built ins.
To see the renovation click here.
Because I know you want to see the baby poop brown.

I know what you are thinking.
Don't be jealous of my large spread of land.
Someday I hope we live on a bigger plot of land.
And face nothing but trees.
Now I can actually see what our neighbor George is eating for dinner.
Its all good, George has good taste in food.
And never walks around his house nude.
See that picnic table?
I hope to have it painted by the time summer is over.
My kids kill me during the summer and I mean that in the best way.
I am just so busy that little projects just have to wait.
I am told I will miss these days so lack of content on the blog is a small price to pay.
Plus the pool's nachos are spastastic.
See Zoe?
She got outta the pen for the summer.
Those red Adirondack chairs are plastic and from Home Depot.
Only 18 bucks each.



OK that is it.
Warts and all.
Or hemorrhoids and all.
Your choice.
And you can see how creative I once was by all the link backs to projects I used to do.
Sigh.

I will be taking a blog vacay starting Wednesday through next Wednesday.
That is why this post is so long.
No its not.
I just don't know when to shut up.
I will try and stay connected but if you don't hear from me, I am not stuck under heavy furniture.
Have a great week!

Baseball or Quesadillas- Durex Campaign

The hubs and I are special.
Yes, special.
We had two first dates.
Nine years apart.
Our first "first date" was in August of 1993.
We went to a White Sox game (GO SOX!!!), back when it was Comiskey Park.
Well, it was the new Comiskey Park.
Back when it wasn't US Cellular Field.

photo courtesy of baseball-statistics.com



 I remember we ate some pizza, sat right behind home plate, then chatted all the way up to the top of the stadium where we saw bullet holes in the seats.
I remember making a joke about it.
I remember him buying me a cute little White Sox player key chain....that I kept through two other relationships after him.
And I remember being so....smitten.
Yes.
Smitten.
With him and the baseball game, with the conversation (I had never laughed so much on a date) and with the evening.
I still go back to this night in my head.


Six weeks later, we were broken up.
Then life happened and nine years later we were back at this same place.
Not Comiskey but this same relationship place.


For our second "first date", we went to Chili's.
Bar and Grill.
You know, Iwantmybabybackbabybackbabyback.
Kind of fitting, really.

this is the actual establishment. look how pretty. makes me re-think my whole "afraid of chili's" stance.

I know what you are thinking.
What the hell happened to make him take me to a Sox game the first time around then to Chili's?
Its all good, I had a two year old little girl at the time and my time was precious.
This restaurant was literally three minutes from my home at the time and to be honest, we didn't know if it would be our first or last date.
And the grilled chicken quesadilla's were boss.

Photo courtesy of Durex

When Durex had suggested we use their Sparks to help heat things up in our relationship, one of said Sparks was to "re-create your first date".
The first thing we thought of was to go to a Sox game.
But truthfully, it is pricey to go to a ball game.
Plus if we wanted to go alone, we would need to pay for a sitter.
And you are talkin' a good buck fifty to recreate our first date.
And we all knew how the FIRST first date ended....


And those close to me know how I feel about Chili's.
Since our first date, a Chili's near us had been shut down for food contamination.
Just one specific Chili's not the whole chain.
So please don't write me hate mail if you work for Chili's.
Its a fine establishment.
I just wont eat in one.
Because of the outbreak.
That happened eight years ago.


So as much as I really want to add some zest to our marriage in the form of recreating our first date, I also didn't want to have the poops for a week.
Priorities, people.

So instead of recreating our first date, we did what we do best when it comes to spending alone time.
We drink.
Don't get me wrong, we aren't big drinkers but every Saturday night after the kids go to bed, we sit on the couch, have a beer/glass of wine or two and talk.
Or watch 48 Hours Mystery.
It depends on if there is a really good one that isn't a repeat.

What??

Lookie at this cool glass Durex sent in the care package they mailed to us!
It tells you exactly what and to where to add each ingredient to make specific drinks!
I am no bartender so this was perfect for us.
I can't even open a bottle of wine.

Side note: see how much goes into a Mai Tai?
I will never again balk at paying ten bucks for a big glass.
Three different types of rum??
Orange curacao ORGEAT?
Umm, I think that might be illegal in Illinois.

See the martini shaker they sent?
And shot glass and bottle stoppers, rose petals and that cool cookbook!
I specifically covered up the title of the cookbook.
Because I am secretly in third grade.
And I didn't want to offend any of my readers.
Again, sorry Mom.

That arrow is for me, by the way.

By drawing this in the sand while the girls were playing, the hubs hit me with Spark #5.
Spontaneous acts of love.
Also known as: emptying the dishwasher before he goes to work in the morning.




I re-read all of the Sparks, that Durex suggested we all do to spice things up a bit.
And I realized that it is just common sense, really.
But it is nice to get a push now and then to bring back the magic.
Or a shove.
Or a smack on the side of the head.
We all need a little help from time to time and sometimes it is work.
But it can also be lots of fun.

Thank you again to Durex for selecting me to try out your fun products and giving us help to make this seventh year less itchy.
If you want to heat things up in your "kitchen", check out Durex on Facebook or go to their website directly to see all of the Sparks for yourself.

Disclaimer-
I was sent products by Durex at no charge.
I was not paid to write the above testimony but rather wrote how I felt.
I am not a trained monkey who does tricks for animal crackers.
But I do love me an animal cracker.

I "Know" People

I wish I could express to you how much I love blogging and on so many levels.
It is such a great release for me.
To spew out my emotions on a blank white page every week is so therapeutic.
I am not rich by any means but I have gotten so many amazing perks from products to test driving cars to conferences where I can see people I have talked to virtually for years, in person.
And the people.
THE PEOPLE.
These amazing peeps I can call friends.
This is the biggest perk of blogging.
I wish I could show you the love I feel from these ladies.
I do, I wish I could convey it better on a white screen than just saying, "they are amazeballs" or "they rock my world".
Just doesn't seem descriptive enough of the friendships I have formed over the past three years but particularly in the last year.

I met Marianne back in December at a Coca Cola blogging event but I didn't get to really talk to her until day two of the two-day event.
Which utterly sucked.
Because she was funny.
And fun.
And cool.
I would have sucked her into my vortex immediately upon meeting her.
Maybe she is lucky she met me on the second day.
Anyhoo, I loved her instantly.
She is hilarious, self deprecating (just like me) and down.to.earth.
Oh and dainty.
Yes.
DAINTY.


So after talking with her for all of 20 minutes, I learned that she is an author.
Like, she wrote a book.
And sells it.
FOR MONEY!
So I couldn't wait to get my hands on this book.

But life happened and even though I remained in touch via Facebook, blog and Twitter, I still didn't scoop up a copy of this book.
I even saw her in March at a girls night out and STILL didn't think to ask to buy a book.
Or think to go on my computer and press the little button that says AMAZON and buy the damn thing.

Fast forward to May of this year.
Marianne, who not only authored a book, was starring in Chicago's production of Listen To Your Mother.
So through Facebook banter, there began a discussion about pictures being taken of people reading Marianne's book in unusual places.
And I decided that it would be hilarious if I was snapped reading her book while she was doing her reading on stage.
Brilliant really.
Umm, there was only one problem.
I didn't own the book.
And I didn't have Amazon Prime so I couldn't get the book here fast enough before LTYM.
Because I am cheap.
75 bucks is a lot of money for me to shell out for free shipping over the course of a year.
Yet, I STILL buy chap stick in bulk just to put me over the edge so I get free shipping on each order.
I am pretty sure I spend 75 in two months just to get me to qualify for free shipping on each order.
This is one of many reasons why I will be eating ramen every single day when I am 80.


That is until my adorable and dainty...don't forget dainty....friend Marianne sent me a copy last week.
She even autographed it!
She wrote, "You are the cheapest person I know. Buy the next book please. So my kids don't have to eat Beefaroni every night".

Juuust kidding.
But I totally want her to write that in her next book to me.

When it arrived, I read it that night.
And finished it in three days/nights.
My friend Jen can attest, that is really good for me.

I laughed out loud so hard and so much, my family didn't know who I was.
Because I am not normally that happy.
During daylight hours.

I stole away several times in that 72 hour period to read this book.
I even have photographic evidence.
Oh yes.
I had someone take pictures.


In the closet with a flashlight......

 

On the potty.....

 

 

Lounging in my backyard.
You know.
Like I do every day of my life......

Then I realized, I don't look like I am enjoying the book very much.
Hmmmm.

Yes.
Much better.



I laughed during every single chapter.
And that is saying a lot for me.
Back story- I don't normally laugh out loud at things others laugh at.
It takes quite a bit for me to actually form laughter.
I am kind of a laugh snob.
When I write LOL or LMAO, chances are, I am not really laughing out loud or laughing my a@# off.
This also goes for when I read a book.
There are very few pieces of literature that have made me laugh out loud over the years.
Janet Evanovich's early Stephanie Plum novels come to mind.
EARLY novels.
Think books 1-8.
The movie based on book one suuuuucked by the way.
And Katherine Heigl as Stephanie??
ARE YOU HIGH????

Tangent.

But this book, oh my baby in a buggy, this book.
Made me roar from start to finish.

A few things:

The park scene where she was yelling at Joey (give my favorite a hug) about peeing in the grass?
Holy crap.
I will just say it.
I peed my pants.
A little.





OK a lot.
I peed a lot.




Joe's quest for the perfect potato chip is not lost on me.
Those folded over Lay's chips are my crack.
And I have a chip company that I want to talk to you about the next time I see you, by the way.
Best chip you will ever eat.
My Ohio contingent are nodding their heads now.
Order the plain and the salt and vinegar.
Joe will never eat a Lay's chip again.

The zoo?
Right.There.With.Ya.Sistah.

And I am guilty of "discount disease" as well.
These pants I am wearing?
$3.99 at Goodwill with the 50% off Sunday discount.

So thank you, dear friend for making my children see what a happy mommy looks like when the sun is out.
I love this book so much.
Go out and buy it.
Seriously.
What are you waiting for?
Don't you want to be happy??



You can buy Marianne's book here.
I have a friend with a book on Amazon.
I can't say it enough.




 I have two other friends who have authored books as well!
Look at me, the bottom feeder mingling with the up and comers!

My friend Heather....who is coming to Chitown in two weeks...holla...recently wrote this book.
And I was gonna be a part of it.
But I didn't know how to compress a video.
That's OK.
You don't need to see my double chin up close and personal.

You can buy Heather's book here.
Kindle only, as far as I can see.


And my dear friend and blog big sis has authored a cool book about traveling Chicagoland with teens and tweens.
She is the person who knows where the best burger is, the best everything is.
So take it from me, you need this book.
Even if you don't live in Chicago.
Because you know you want to come visit.

You can buy Melisa's book here.
You can also go here to check out the book and Melisa.

How Kari Got Her Groove Back- Durex Campaign

So I mentioned to you in a post here about how the hubs and I just celebrated our seven year wedding anniversary.
And heard from so many people about their fears and apprehensions over the whole itch thing.

Seven year not vaginal.

The hubs and I were doing good but kind of hit a little slump as of late due to lots of things: life, kids, no time together, finances, good TV.
WHAT?
 Admit it, if you had the chance to watch a Candice Glover win American Idol or a little nookie in the boudoir, what are you choosing?
AND THIS IS WHY YOUR MARRIAGE ISN'T IN A SLUMP.

 

photo courtesy of Durex

When I was approached by Durex a month ago, it couldn't have come at a better time.
As if sent a cue from the Universe, Durex wanted us to work on our marriage.
Our intimacy.
You know, get out of our "slump".
When the hubs heard about this, it was the first time he got truly interested in my blogging.
And I mean that in the most loving way.

Durex sent us this amazing box full of goodies:

With fun things like a martini shaker, a cool aphrodisiac cookbook, little "love notes" to read to each other and even a gift card to get a couples massage at a spa near us!
There were so many amazing items in here and I love getting care packages so this made me giddy.
The hubs and I opened it together one evening and it was fun to go through all the cool new gadgets together.
Then we closed the box and went to sleep.
I know what you are thinking.
How on EARTH could we ever be in a slump??
I know, I know, don't be jealous.
You too can have this magic for yourselves!


So we formulated a plan:

We picked a night where we could focus on just us.
Time alone to go through the box and use some of the items they sent to us to help us with said slump.
No interruptions from the kids.
No neighbors knocking at the door.
Just us.

Let me set the stage for our romantic evening:

The hubs had just come off a four day straight 16 hour a day work week.
It was also a Saturday so not only had he worked 12 hours this day but I had two soccer games, a five year old who woke up at 5 am and decided this was the day that she was gonna break in her new "whiny" voice.
The 13 year old was at a sleepover so she was gone but the previous evening had gone to open gym at the local gymnastics place and had a falling out with one of her friends.
So that friend's mom called me.
On our "us" night.
15 minutes after the hubs got home.
To inform me that my oldest had left her daughter at said gym place without telling her.
Wait, wait, wait.....

First we had some of the above to "set the mood".
So then the phone call came.
After I handled that situation, we were raring to go.
Except for the fact that there was a Friends marathon on TV.
And it was the Chandler Monica wedding two part episode season finale.
I KNOW!!

It is amazing we ever got pregnant.


We focused on two of the "Sparks" they provided to get us inspired.
And trust me, when you have been together for 11 years, you can use a little spark here and there.
More like a wildfire but a spark will have to do.


The first spark we chose to focus on was massage (spark #13)
Then decided on love notes instead (spark #4).
Then back to massage ( #13 again).
Then aphrodisiac cocktails (#7).
And then back to massage (#13).

I was driving the massage campaign home.
He just wanted to get drunk.
I won.

So we took our massage oil and I gave him a massage first.
Except that I have ADD when it comes to giving massages.
About 3 minutes in, I was all...."is it my turn yet?"
And he was all, "no. Remember, YOU wanted to do massage."
And I was all, "yes! I wanted to GET a massage not GIVE a massage".
And he was all, "RUB MY BACK WOMAN!"
And I was all, "RUB IT YOURSELF".


OK so the massage wasn't as relaxing and slump-defying as it sounded.


So then we used these cool cards they sent us and tried to find inspiration in these:

This should do the trick!
YES.

Ummmmm.
Hmmmmm.
Uhhhhhhh.
Huhhhhhh.






(crickets chirping. softly)









Me- "Are we too dumb for these questions?"
Hubs- "What does mythical mean?"

29 cards later......

OK so we needed to be smarter AND have more oomph and less slump.

Back to this......

We actually made a drinking game out of the cards.
Every time we heard a word we didn't understand, take a drink!
So inadvertently it started working.
All together.
The massage, the alcohol and the cards.


I think we all know how this ends.
And my mom reads this blog, so lets keep it clean.

Durex thank you.
For getting us outta the slump.
And for educating us as well.
Return for part two next week where we decided to re-create our first date.
This should be a doozy.

In the meantime, check out Durex on Facebook.
Ooh and head on over to their pad to check out some sparks to help you ignite things a little bit.



Disclaimer-
The items I shared with you in this post were sent to me, free of charge, by Durex.
These opinions are all my own.
I am not anybody's puppet so I will not say nice things if I don't feel nice vibes.
Wow....kind of goes with today's theme.
Sorry, Mom.

"Where Are They Now?" or How is my "Stuff" Standing the Test of Time

Ok.
We need to have an intervention.
With the weather.
In Chicago.
Maybe its like this near you?
This has been our weather for the past 48 hours: humid and hot; rain; sun showers; thunder sun; drop in temperature; lightening; wind; more cold.
We are very blessed that we didn't have tornadoes to contend with, my heart goes out to Oklahoma yet again and to the rest of the Midwest who had to deal with nasty weather.
But seriously, what is going on?
Is there something we don't know?
Is summer not happening this year?
Because I didn't get the memo.
Or the meme.
What is a meme, by the way?
Should I know this?
I should, I am a blogger, I should know this.
You can read about how I made some other bloggers mad here.
By the way, it's tip number 3 that is in question, so you don't have to read the whole thing.
Your welcome.


Do you ever notice that a lot of DIY blogs show off these awesome projects then you never see them again?
I have a theory.
Some of those "projects" are created just for the blog.
Shhhh.
Don't tell anyone, it will be our little secret!
I am guilty as all get out of this one too, so I am not throwing anyone under the bus.
So please don't send me a nasty email or comment.

I used to do this more in the beginning of this blog because I needed "content".
Then I went through an "awakening" if you will and stopped doing that.
Because I realized that I didn't have to always have a cool project to keep you reading this blog.
And you would seriously start to get a little hangry (hungry + angry......I am always hungry so I figured you must be too. You know. Because we are so much alike.) and resentful of all of these "projects" that I was "creating".
I don't have time to be that creative.
Or an assistant who does it for me.
So I decided to go down memory lane and revisit some old projects and see (good and bad) how they are hanging in there.
Don't judge me.
I am baring my soul to you today.
And an embarrassing nip slip as well.
That's just a euphemism.



Dollar Tree Glass Holder        September 2011





The idea for this came to me when I was walking the craft aisle at my local Dollar Tree.
I had seen these cool jar containers on Pinterest and thought I could make something similar to those only a lot cheaper.
These babies only cost me two dollars to make for each one.
I never thought these would take off the way they have.
I have Pinterest to thank for sending these blasting through the internet.
To this day, I have had 8500 page views for this blog post ALONE.
 So where is this blog supahstar now?

On the crapper.
Yep.
Holding fuzzy green rocks.
I know.
I couldn't make this stuff up!
I made two of these bad boys back in 2011 but broke one of them two Christmases ago while decorating.
Then went back to Dollar Tree to find the supplies to make a replacement and couldn't find either item.
I STILL can't find either item.
At the three different Dollar Tree's I shopped at.
So if you want to make this craft today, I really hope your Dollar Tree has these items.
Otherwise this craft is considered.....gasp.....obsolete!





Master Bath Makeover              October 2012






It started with a Monistat container on my counter.
And ended up with an amazing reveal that cost me less than 250 dollars.
This was for everything from flooring, new shower curtain and paint to new light and sink fixtures.
So what does it look like now?

Pretty much the same.
I mean, I had the same crappy bathroom for seven years, I am pretty sure there will be no changes for the rest of the time we live here.
Just calling it like I see it.

I did add this little stain glass window art that used to be in our kitchen.
I love it in here so much more, I feel like it makes it look farmhousey.
And really, who doesn't love a farmhouse potty?





Old Kitchen Table Makeover                   March 2012



This was a labor of love.
I took an old kitchen table and turned it into a desk space for our family to work on the computer and do homework.
It only took me a week to refinish this from sanding, painting and lacquer finish.
And I loved how it turned out!
So where is this table now?

Oh yes.
Ohhhhh yesss.
This is what happens when you aren't a professional.
No.
This is what happens when you are an idiot.
Yes.
That is it.
The paint on the edges is slowly coming off.
So I did what I do best.
Worked with what I had........

......... I flipped the entire table around so that the printer and cords hid the scuff marks.
Awww yeah.
AWWWWW YEAAAAH.
You are starting to realize that I am the least "Grace Full" person you will ever meet, right?
Hey, I could have hid this from you but I am all about transparency.
Which is obvious by how much of the old table you can see through the craptastic paint job I did.


Wedding Vow Sign        May 2011




This was my first real big girl blog project.
My first "aha" project, if you will.
I had an old entertainment center door in our basement and was going to give it away to Goodwill.
Until I had an inspiring moment via my then blog hero and now bestie, Bec at Little Lucy Lu.
Is it still a focal point?

It is in the same exact place as it was the day we placed it up there.
In fact, it hasn't physically moved since that May day in 2011.
And yes, I have dusted up there since.
A couple times.
Or once.




Rascal Flatts Artwork   August 2011



I love this piece of artwork that I created with "our song's" lyrics.
And it cost me virtually nothing to make.
Is it still a part of our lives?

Fer sure.
This hasn't moved anywhere either in the two years since we put it up here.
It is perfect for this room and everyone asks about this when they come in here for the first time.

There is the remote!
This is actually clean.
I cropped this picture.
What you don't see goin' on is a lunch "picnic" with food scraps on a blanket, a basket of laundry and ten pairs of shoes.
Bless the broken road indeed.


Rolling Kitchen Island    April 2012



I found this great rolling cart at Goodwill and turned it into something pretty cool.
A funky, industrial kitchen island.
That was possessed.
By Timmy.
Did it make the cut?

Sad trombone.
No.
This is my basement storage area.
Poor Timmy didn't see what hit him.
I feel so sad about this because I really love this redo and am desperately looking for a new home for him.
I do bring him out for parties and used him as a beverage cart at my last big party in December.
But to keep him in our kitchen day to day, there just isn't enough room.
So I am not saying goodbye to Timmy yet.
He still has lots of life in him, I just need to find him the right spot.
Or Lassie.
You younger readers won't get that.
And that's OK.

Kitchen Table Chairs        April 2012 (apparently, I was very busy last April)





I had these roadside kitchen chairs (yes, found these alongside the road) that were black and I wanted to lighten up our kitchen.
So I decided to paint them.
How are they doing today?

Still lovin' on these chairs.
And am so glad I went with off white.
Buuuuutt.......

 

They are starting to look at little shabby chic.

That's OK, we have kids.

Alright, I can't totally blame the kids, we are probably to blame for this too.

We sit on these chairs every night for dinner and so the black paint is showing through because these chairs are well loved and well used.

Yes. I will go with that.

Its all good because it looks kinda cool.

 

I meant to do this.

That's what I will say.

 

 

 

So now that I have shown you my "dirty little secrets", do you still love me?

Yes but will you let me paint anything in your home?

Smaaaaart person.