National WHY IN THE HELL DO WE NEED A DAY FOR EVERY SINGLE THING

Chalk this blog post up to pre-menopause or why I won’t ever get a book deal.
I can hear y’all NOT commenting now.
Blame Facebook yet again for me finding out about yet again another something or another that we need to be celebrating.
I didn’t know there was a Sibling Day.
My brother actually texted me and said “I would have sent you a card?”
I said “I don’t think it’s an actual day, Matt”.
Like, I think it’s made up like when Hallmark made up Secretary’s Day, Sweetest Day etc.
Don’t quote me on that, it’s not fact, its a “term” according to Wikipedia.
See, I even did research for you!There is this website called National Day Calendar that has every national holiday known to man listed.
You got that right.
Every National Holiday known to man.
Not the big ones, the obscure, the easily missed, the little known ones.
The ones you forget to buy the cards for.
The ones Hallmark hasn’t stocked …yet.
Someone, somewhere is sitting in a little office making up holidays that we need to celebrate.
Bake cakes for, buy gifts for and eventually go to Hallmark and buy cards for.
Some of them are indeed pretty cool and some are interesting, but some?
Well, some are just not worthy of a day, quite honestly.But I am saving you the trouble of going through each and every quirky holiday on the website by listing some of my personal favorites.
Unless you want to go and look for yourself.
To which I say, you really owe it to yourself to go.
Especially if you have some time to kill.
Like if you are in the dentist chair and getting a root canal?
Or say getting your taxes done and have a couple hours to kill?
Or the Kirby salesman is at your home and won’t let you leave?
Because life isn’t short enough.

courtesy of en.wikipedia.org

I started with my birthday, April 28th, which happens to also be National Blueberry Pie Day!
I love that a “pie day” falls on my birthday!!
That made me very happy.
So this research did start off on a very positive note.
But poetry reading also fell on my day and I am not big on poetry so you win some, you lose some.
There were four national “days” that fell on my birthday alone, this shows you how many things we “need” to celebrate nowadays.
So much pressure.

 

Screenshot courtesy A Grace Full Life

May 3- National Two Different Colored Shoes Day

I am not making this up.
I added the screen shot on purpose so you would believe me.
Actually, the shoes they show aren’t even two different colors.
The meaning behind it is this: ” to celebrate human diversity”.
That is wonderful!
THEN CALL IT DIVERSITY DAY.
Not “two different color shoe day”.
That is why no one on the planet knows about this holiday.
It’s also why it’s “unofficial”.

 

courtesy of commons.wikimedia.org

May 9- National Moscato Day

Now THIS is a holiday I can get behind.
Of course this “unofficial” “holiday” was created by, none other than the Gallo Family.
Shocker.

Screenshot courtesy of A Grace Full Life

May 9th is also National Lost Sock Memorial Day

Sigh.
I can’t even.
WHY?
Why are we…..
Next….

June 2- National Bubba Day

To all those nicknamed, or just called Bubba.
Yep.
That’s it.
That’s my brother up there.
He was nicknamed Bubba many moons ago.
I’ve called him Bubby for years, my husband calls him Bubs and my girls call him Uncle Bubba.
He’s a great guy and all and I am sure there are many a great brother/uncle named Bubba out there but do we really need an entire day dedicated to all the Bubba’s out there?
One would argue that is considered a birthday?
Or if said Bubba was a dad, that would be considered  Father’s Day?
Why a specific Bubba Day?
Why the need to clutter up the calendar with yet another day of celebration?
I don’t mean to be a downer.
I love a good party and a reason to celebrate!
Any reason to break out the party favors and cake is a good reason to me but why all the added pressure in life to create all these “days” to our social lives?
And just like that I used nine “Bubba’s” in one paragraph.
The Bubba algorhythms are like going cray somewhere.
I have no idea what that even means.

 

courtesy of pixabay.com

July 3- National Eat Your Beans Day

Why not make it July 4th and save a holiday?
Really?
REALLY??
Because we alllll know we will be imbibing on some kind of bean or another on July 4th all around the US of A.
Baked beans, baked bean casserole, bean salad, beans and rice, beans in a bucket.
I made that last one up but I am quite sure somewhere, somehow in this amazing country, that is being done.
Because beans are HUGE in America especially in the summer and especially on the 4th of July.
NOT on July 3rd.
Really.

courtesy of flickr.com
courtesy of pixabay.com

 

 

July 11- National Cheer Up The Lonely Day

Umm excuse me but shouldn’t that be everyday???
I mean shouldn’t we be doing that all the time not just one day out of the year?

So I was googling “lonely people” for images and many sad, sad images came up but the two above just stopped me.
The saddest thing I have ever seen, I mean come on…a teddy bear who can’t face the day??
Kermit the frog, sitting alone on the beach??
OMG FOR THE LOVE OF PETE PEOPLE, CHEER UP THE LONELY EVERY DAY!
NOT JUST ONCE A YEAR.
Geez.

*SIDE NOTE of course I always use pictures on my blog that are labeled for re-use in case you are wondering
So that I don’t get sued. Then end up lonely. *

 

July 13- National Beans and Franks Day

Seriously?
Beans gets two damn days in a year??
TEN DAYS APART FROM EACH OTHER?!?!?
What the muffin??
But mmmm beans.
AND GO CALL KERMIT.

August 3- National Grab Some Nuts Day

But of course I didn’t think of those kind of nuts when I first saw this holiday.
Noooooo sirreee, I thought of something much more sinister.
Because HELLO HAVE YOU NEVER MET ME?
But then the Internet sends me gems.
Little drops of Heaven.
Right into my little filthy mitts.

courtesy of flickr.com

I DID NOT PHOTO SHOP.
BECAUSE I DON’T KNOW HOW TO PHOTO SHOP.
Yep, that caption was there for everyone and God to see.
Yes you do  Mr. Squirrel.
Yes. You. Do.
I can’t make this stuff up.

August 3rd is also my parents wedding anniversary.
No jokes there.
But August 3rd is also the eve of my husband’s birthday.
National Grab Some Nuts Day is on the eve of my hubs birthday…..so many jokes, so little time.
Moving on.
FINALLY A HOLIDAY WORTH CELEBRATING.

 

October 4- National Taco Day

Actually, this is our dating anniversary.
OMG it’s like kismet.
Only we didn’t have tacos on our anniversary but we DID eat at Chili’s.
Nah, still not kismet.
Totally going out for taco’s this year and maybe start celebrating National Taco Day instead of our dating anniversary since it’s not “technically an anniversary you celebrate blah blah blah” after you get married.
But neither is “Grab Your Nuts Day” but don’t tell that squirrel up there.

October 25- Chucky the Notorious Killer Doll Day

Yep, its listed.
Nope no one cares.
Next.

Screenshot courtesy of A Grace Full Life

I think when they got to November they just gave up.
Cook For Your Pets Day?
Deviled Egg Day??
CHICKEN LADY DAY???
There are a few good ones thrown in there.
Donut day, men make dinner day (which should not be a holiday IT SHOULD BE EVERY DAY, this must have been made in the 50s, nacho day).
Maybe the National Calendar people are starting to show that, they too, are human and are realizing that these holiday’s are just too hard to keep up with!

Nope.
Back to December.

sophomore year 1985
Me circa 1985

December 8- Pretend to Be a Time Traveler Day

I want to celebrate this and walk into a room dressed like me in 1985!
Poppin’ my collar and BRIGHT BLUE HEAVY EYELINER ALL BOOM!
Totally freak out my children.
“Like, totally hi!”
“OMG YOU LOOK SO RAD TUBULAR!”
“DON’T.”
” HAVE. ”
“A. ”
“COW.”
They would HATE 1985 me.
Kind of like having a foreign exchange student in the house.
Only with crows feet and really bad fashion sense.
December 8th….totally writing that on the calendar.

Maybe this is going to be fun after all.

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