It’s kind of a big deal around here.
Back in the olden days, I used to share tutorials of things such as how to make crafts and something called…tell me if you have heard of it…DIY.
It is an abbreviation for “do it yourself “.
You don’t need to hire out to decorate your home for fall!
Don’t believe those bloggers in Utah who have five kids and who’s homes look like they just got paid by Better Homes and Gardens because they just did.
OOPSIES DID I SAY THAT OUT LOUD??
– I am funny and DIY and funny apparently don’t mix. You can’t do both, dammit. So I left. Took my tool box and skedaddled. MANIACAL LAUGHTER. Don’t be silly, I don’t have a toolbox…….
That being said, I don’t do many DIY or decorating posts any more because I feel like that isn’t the pulse of my readers here so I don’t really dwell on it.
Except when it comes to Fall.
Fall is when I am down with decorating and documenting it on the blog.
When it isn’t Christmas.
Because who doesn’t want to see 10-15 pictures of the same damn pumpkins that were on my mantel last year?
I know you have been anxiously awaiting this post.
It is here.
It’s okay, you can rest easy.
It’s been a long year waiting, hasn’t it?
The only that changed is I added a silver milk can from the Target dollar spot.
I AM ON FIRE.
Look, I realize that among the people in my daily life I am in the minority as far as decorating my mantel for each season but you must realize the pressure on decor blogs for this kind of crap.
It is intense.
Like Dancing for the Stars as it pertains to all things autumnal and I used to fall victim to it.
Oh sure, I occasionally get a tinge of wanting to re-paint my entire family room and go all minimalist when I see some of my favorite decor blogs.
It is hard to quit.
I liken it to what those who have a Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte addiction must be going through.
I feel you, I really do.
Like, I would love to re-paint that room above all white then take that nasty mauve tile around the fireplace and turn it into some sort of plank wood.
But that would cost money.
And take energy, neither of which I have a lot of any more.
See that table above?
I wrote about it a long time ago on the blog, I am sure the post isn’t really great because in the beginning my posts kind of sucked.
I used a lot of smiley faces, my paragraphs ran together and I incorporated quite a few bold letters.
I don’t know why.
Any way, this table started out as baby vomit in color then I painted it black then I painted it this color, no idea what the name is because I am such a damn good DIY blogger.
I love this table though and I only paid four dollars for her five years ago.
See that lamp?
Also from Goodwill three years ago, you can read all about it here if you dare but I only paid $3.99 for this lamp.
Which is why I can’t complain about the crooked lamp shade.
That crooked lamp shade.
THAT CROOKED LAMP SHADE.
For three years I have been straightening it, then re-straightening it.
I love it too much to get rid of it but it does give me a little case of hives every time I see it.
But the shade perfectly bookends my crooked picture frames, so it’s all good.
We strive for the Haunted House look here.
That metal thing on my dining room table was a free gift from a Southern Living at Home party I hosted my first fall in this home ten years ago.
I love that thing because all you do is throw the fake fruit in there and boom you have a centerpiece.
Perfect for crooked families like ours.
Yes that is a mirror on the table.
It looked cool.
Also I didn’t have anywhere else to put it.
It looks put together but I just threw that leaf garland up there like I have been for ten years.
Admit it, the mirror looks cool.
You can’t stop looking at the mirror.
Maybe it is you that has the problem?
Like yourself much??
By the way, these pictures were taken while everyone was at school/work.
Usually this table is covered in my husband’s work stuff/Anna’s cheer stuff/my computer/Ella’s school stuff.
The mirror sees so much……..
Basket o’ pumpkins.
Not as much fun as a barrel o’ monkeys but a lot less stinkier.
I got that basket at Marshall’s this summer on clearance for three dollars.
I don’t know why I felt the need to tell you that.
I am such a bragger.
That sign I made when I had a crafty bone in my body but really anyone can make it as it takes no energy whatsoever.
Go to Dollar Tree and get a mini picture frame, any color.
Paint it to the color of your choice, I chose black because Halloween but it could be green or orange or red, you pick.
Then go to your computer and type the words boo on a word program.
Hit print and cut to fit the frame.
That is it, folks.
I know what you are thinking:
I should have a show on the DIY network.
I am getting my agent working on that.
But I need to get an agent first.
And have a remote interest in having a show on television to begin with.
A bowl of acorns!!
I found these in the dollar spot of Target and I couldn’t resist.
Yes, it was an impulse buy.
I put them down, then picked them up.
Then put them down.
Then picked them up again.
I reasoned that I could have bought a box of cereal for the price of these stupid acorns but heck if they aren’t adorable.
And hearing Ella say, “look! baby acorns!” every time she comes in the house from the backyard is worth every penny.
Here is a “pro tip”.
No it isn’t, it’s a tip I just made up but wanted to sound like I knew what I was talking about.
See? I really could have my own show.
I sound like I could spread the manure really good.
Anyhoo, decorate with fruit.
Then you can eat your decor.
How fun is that?
Only don’t decorate with cookies or pie.
Or you won’t ever have decor.
Unless you live in Gwyneth Paltrow’s house.
But she probably decorates with kale or some sh$%.
There is that 31 sign, not to be confused with Thirty One products.
By the way, I think I made my 31 sign before Thirty One products became popular.
Here is the post where you can learn to make your own sign.
Because I know you want one.
It was a really popular post.
No it wasn’t but let’s bring it back because I think I was just ahead of my time and it wasn’t appreciated.
We got this little guy at Cracker Barrel on the way home from Chattanooga last summer and let me tell you, we are suckers for the CB gift shop.
Whoooo boy, I can’t help myself in that place.
Goo goo clusters?
Seasonal toys that play the cymbals?
Television shows from the 70s on audio tape??
Don’t mind if I do!
Maybe I should be the spokesperson for Cracker Barrel?
I have had these Halloween books out since Anna was little.
She loved them so much and now Ella loves these too.
I loved watching Anna get so excited when she would see these appear after not seeing them all year and now get to re-live that with Ella.
I will bring these out even when Ella outgrows them and someday, the girls will have these books to pass on to their kids.
There is just something about the books you had as a child.
So there you have it, another Halloween mantel post.
Kind of feel like you wasted ten minutes of your life?
Like eating Chinese food for your brain.
You end up hungry for more ten minutes after reading it.
But then it gives you an excuse to read more of my posts.
Or go eat some fried rice.
Now I am really hungry for fried rice.
At 9 am.
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